I simply have no way of knowing the experience that soldiers have in times of war, but i'd have to imagine it is a million times that of what i am getting a taste of now. The people who are battling alongside me are my newfound friends and family, and we know, unlike anyone else can, how devistating it is when one of us falls.
The Pathology test we took on Monday was horrendous. Words cannot describe how READY, how ultimately prepared i felt going into the test, and how crushing the blow was when i kept reading questions that i could not even wrap my mind around. It was more than mere forgetfulness. I had spent hours with my notes and the book pouring over what i thought was going to be covered. As a class, we had come together like never before to compile a Checklist to help teach ourselves important key concepts. It was an amazing accomplishment in and of itself.
But no one who grades that test will ever know. We all faltered. Together. *sigh*
However, it's amazing what a few twinkle-lights, a warm fire on an Autumn night, and good food can do to lift the spirits! (And, of course, an amazing husband to act as light-stringer, host and all-around hero.)
No one was optomistic about the exam. Even those that normally set the curve (when there is such grace) were not in high spirits. But for a few hours, we used our grief as fuel to eat, drink and be as merry as possible. (Griping was allowed. And welcomed. ...it went in rounds, really... a little laughter, a little crying, another S'more or two...) And it was a great night, that made up for a disappointing day. A win, in the end.
yeah... i'll miss this. The pain and defeat sometimes take their toll on us. And more than once, there have been tears and streams of curses flowing at the same time, but... it's worth it. I'm right where i want to be.
I love my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment